...three men jump out of a car and attack two gay men who had been walking their dog. Both men are hospitalised and one has teeth broken. The lawyer for the attackers later says that the three men felt threatened by the gay couple. The only injury sustained by the attackers is a scrape on one man's knuckle from hitting one of the victims in the mouth.
...a lesbian is fired with the words "People like you make me sick" after a co-worker gossips about seeing the woman out on a date with another woman.
...a gay man is beaten by his father and thrown bleeding into the street when he comes out to his parents. He is not allowed back into the house to get any of his belongings. When he calls the police and explains what happened he is told that "parental discipline" is not something the police get involved in.
...a lesbian couple walks to their car and finds their "Hatred is not a family value" bumper-sticker defaced to read "Hatred is a family value". Vandals had cut the sticker off the car leaving scratches.
...two gay men eating dinner in a high-priced restaurant are asked to leave when another patron complains to the management about their blatant "homosexual activity". The men had been touching hands across the table.
...a lesbian is unable to adopt the child she is raising with her partner because legislation that would protect her is not supported by the provincial government.
HOMOPHOBIA is the fear of people identified as gay or lesbian. Dr George Weinberg coined the phrase in 1972 and defined homophobia as "the dread of being in close quarters with homosexuals". In the 1990's homophobia is used as a catch all phrase to describe any act that impinges on the rights of individuals because of their sexuality. Changing seats on the subway to "get away from that queer", actively working against legislation designed to recognise gay and lesbian families, and beating, torturing and killing people believed to be gay or lesbian are all acts of homophobia.
As individuals, lesbians and gay men react to acts of homophobia in many ways. Some of us choose to defy homophobia by wearing buttons and ribbons on our jackets that identify us; by marching in parades; and by living life "out of the closet". Others allow homophobia to force us into living quietly, keeping our affections and sexual expression hidden.
Systemic and institutional discrimination allow some people to feel its acceptable to taunt or assault gays and lesbians. Societal discrimination also allows more subtle instances of prejudice exist. It's always hard to listen to the words "faggy", "queer" or "gay" used to denigrate something the speaker doesn't like or disagrees with. These entrenched attitudes will not change until it is made clear and obvious that prejudice is unacceptable in our society. Homophobia is not just individual acts of hatred and violence, but the pervasive attitude in our society that gay men and lesbians are threats, or that we are mentally ill or that there is just something wrong with us being who we are.
Experiences with hate and prejudice affect me as an individual, even if the prejudice was aimed at my community. It may be easy to view the "gay community" as the "enemy" and to say and do hateful things in an attempt to maintain so called traditional values. But my life is on hold while I wait with all gays and lesbians to be treated as an equal member of society. My family is not recognised by all Canadian governments; my spouse may not be able to adopt the child we want to have; I am not able to cover my spouse through my benefit package at work. When we decided to live together and form a family we were not allowed to be married in a church or to take a family name because neither the Anglican church nor the government accept the validity of our relationship.
I have been physically assaulted and am frequently verbally assaulted. I am not unique in my experiences. These acts of homophobia, subtle and blatant, happen every day to men and women everywhere. I live in a world where it is acceptable for a teacher to lose her job if she is suspected of being a lesbian, for a priest to be inhibited for being in relationship with another man, for a car full of young men to throw beer bottles at gay couples walking down the street. I live in a country where one individual can arbitrarily decide to issue a deportation order to a lesbian, saying that "separation poses no undue hardship to her or to her spouse".
I live with the knowledge that the button I wear on my jacket identifies me as a homosexual and that I leave myself open to verbal taunts. I live a very "out" life but there are a number of cities where I can not hold hands with my spouse because of fears for my physical safety.
I have been hurt by an unkind remark from a stranger and hurt by a similar remark made by a co-worker who went on to say "but of course, you're not like those other queers". I've been told I make a political statement by talking about my spouse in the same ways that my co-workers speak of their spouses and lovers. All of these examples are to illustrate how one part of who I am can prejudice people against me. They don't see the funny, talented, articulate person I am. They see the homosexual. I am more than my sexuality but because of homophobia they will never know that.
It seems very easy for homophobic people to use the Bible as a weapon to attack us. Bishop Parke-Taylor, in an article to the House of Bishops in 1978, said "you can prove anything by scripture". While he is probably right I will still close with a quote from 1 Corinthians, "...there are three things that last; faith, hope and love; and the greatest of these is love."
