Volume 3 Issue 4 ~~Autumn 1998
Integrity/Calgary
Support for gay, lesbian and bisexual Christians & friends
Intergrity News
Integrity Calgary has a new executive. The three "officials" are:
Chairman: John Firmston
Treasurer: Winston Noren
Secretary: Brian Quiring
At our first "official" meeting, the three of us discussed what the next steps should be. After discussing at length the pros and cons of becoming a non-profit Society, it was decided to work toward that goal. The necessary papers were secured from Gary Courtney, and tentative "requirements" for membership were talked about. We all felt that a membership fee of ANY sort would not be the way for this Integrity to proceed. Instead, we thought that allowing ones name to be on the mailing list would constitute membership. Other areas were discussed, such as what should go in the by-laws of our non-profit society, but nothing definite was pinned down. That will be drawn up at a later meeting, and then presented for discussion by everyone.
We shall keep you posted!
Brian Quiring
Please contct Robert at 202-3082 for the most uptodate information on Social activities for Integrity/Calgary.
From Our Chair Person
Dan has asked me to write a few words for the newsletter in my capacity as chairperson of Integrity. I won't start with the usual business about the fall season being upon us, about the colors and the crispness and all that. I only want to say that I can't believe that were already halfway through it.
I have just learned of the brutal execution of Matthew Shepard in Wyoming. I feel deeply saddened by this tragedy, but also angry about the fact that this incident occurred in a state that does not yet have laws against hate crimes because such laws are seen to give gays special rights. Matthew's death reminds us that there is much work yet to be done to free gays and other minorities from prejudice and persecution. Perhaps he will become a martyr for us. Perhaps his death will expose the horror of hate crime and will lead lawmakers toward legislation that would criminalize acts of hatred against minorities. Perhaps, by the time you read this, we will have already held a memorial service for Matthew. If we haven't, then I hope we will all take the time to pray for Matthew's family and friends, for the perpetrators of this horrible crime, and for all gay, lesbian, and bisexual people who have suffered from hatred and persecution.
My news is that I've been short-listed for the parish of Woodsdale in Kelowna. I should be hearing about an interview at any time now. It sound like an exciting possibility for me but it will be very interesting to see
how the selection committee responds to the fact that I'm gay. Archbishop Crawley has told me that it is a "non-issue" as far as he is concerned. Let's hope it's that way for the parish too.
Regarding the business of Integrity, Winston, Brian and I met over lunch on Sunday, October 4th. We have put together the framework for a new set of bylaws for Integrity, and have been careful to define membership in such a way that it is not exclusive. Brian will ask a lawyer in our community, Gary Courtney, to review what we have written and suggest any changes or improvements. We hope to present a proposed set of bylaws to the group sometime in November.
The only other news that I can think of at the moment is that Robert and I will be hosting an Integrity evening in our home on Saturday, November 14th at about 8 o'clock. Look forward to seeing you then!
Pax,
John
Gay Self-Esteem
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
· Nurture self through meditation and spiritual development.
· Nurture the body through rest and relaxation, proper nutrition, and exercise.
· Read gay-positive literature.
· Be a positive role model for younger gay people.
· Discourage use of gay negative language.
· Confront your own homophobia and hetrosexism.
· Educate yourself regarding the facts rather than myths and stereotypes.
· Educate yourself regarding political issues associated with homosexuality. Speak out.
· Affirm yourself as a gay person daily. Developing positive gay self-esteem involves utilizing a proactive response to external events and taking responsibility for one' own thoughts, feelings, and behaviours.
-Waston & Ross, Gay self-esteem...on the rise.
Just for Fun
John invited his mother over for dinner. During the meal, his mother couldn't help noticing how handsome John's roommate was. She had long been suspicious of John's sexuality and this only made her more curious. Over the course of the evening, while watching the two men interact, she started to wonder if there was more between John and the roommate than met the eye. Reading his mom's thoughts, John volunteered, "I know what you must be thinking, but I assure you, Mike and I are just roommates." About a week later, Mike came to John and said,
"Ever since your mother came to dinner, I've been unable to find the beautiful silver gravy ladle. You don't suppose she took it, do you?" John said, "Well, I doubt it, but I'll write her a letter just to be sure." So he sat down and wrote: "Dear Mother, I'm not saying you 'did' take a gravy ladle from my house, and I'm not saying you 'did not' take a gravy ladle. But the fact remains that one has been missing ever since you were here for dinner."
Several days later, John received a letter from his mother which read: "Dear Son, I'm not saying that you 'do' sleep with Mike, and I'm not saying that you 'don't' sleep with Mike. But the fact remains that if he was sleeping in his own bed, he would have found the gravy ladle by now. Love, Mom"
-Contributed by John C.
8 Common Myth's and Reality......
the following material is adapted by Dan Francis from Rural Gays and Lesbians:Building on the Strengths of Communities, Smith & Mancoske, Editors.
1. M:All gays are effeminate and all lesbians are masculine. R:Except for a small percentage of individuals, it is impossible to recognize a gay or lesbian simply by his/her appearance or mannerisms. 2. M:Gays desire to be women and lesbians desire to be men. R:While homosexuals generally choose a sexual partner of the same gender, their gender identity is similar to that of heterosexuals. A male views himself as male and does not desire to be female. Females view themselves as females and do not desire to be males. 3. M:In a homosexual couple one partner will assume the dominant male role and one will assume the submissive female role. R:It has been verified that the majority of gays and lesbians reject the entire practice of male-female role playing. 4. M:Gays are child molesters. R:The vast majority of child molesting is done by heterosexual men to young girls. 5. M:People are either straight or gay. R:It is a mistake to conceptualise homosexuality and heterosexuality as comprised of two separate categories because many people have had both experiences. 6. M:Gays and lesbians are mentally ill. R:Personality tests reveal no differences (except for sexual preferences) between homosexuals and heterosexuals. 7. M:Gays are to blame for the AIDS epidemic R:Blaming a deadly disease on the group who, in the United States, has suffered and died disproportionally from AIDS is a classic case of blaming the victim. 8. M:People choose to be gay or lesbian. R:It appears that some people are naturally heterosexual in orientation and others are naturally homosexual, just as some people are naturally left-handed and others are naturally right-handed. There is little choose involve in each case.
Sunday, December 13
Wine & Cheese
Fund Raising Social
for Integrity
2:00pm-6:00pm
If you would like to attend please get in contact with Shayne F. at 282-2808, A $20 donation per person would be appreciated.
Food for Thought
Gleanings from Daniel Day Williams What Present Day Theologians are Thinking...
The core of sin is our making ourselves the center of life, rather than accepting the holy God as the center. Lack of trust, self-love, pride, these are three ways in which Christians have expresses the real meaning of sin. The consequences of sin is in the self-imposed loneliness of a loveless life.
There is some light...in all profound religion which the Christian faith can accept as true.
Anglican theology always seeks a synthesis of faith and reason which leaves each open to the dynamic influence of the other. The Logos incarnate in Christ fulfils and incorporates the highest human reason. We cannot by our own power reach high enough to meet God in his ultimate truth. His word reaches down to us.
Gustaf Aulén, bishop of the Swedish Lutheran Church...[says] in short for the Christian the work of justice is one with the work of love. in this sense love is the fulfillment of the law, as Paul says. Aulén vigorously argues that the function of human law is not only to restrain evildoers. It has the creative function of laying foundations for human fellowship.
A critical understanding of the Bible is essential if the Church is to be kept free from serving a new idol in the literal word of a book rather than in the truth which is expresses through human and limited means.
Everyone who tries to say what the Christian faith and life is for him, is engaging in theological work.... We never exhaust the meaning of Jesus Christ. All human knowledge is relevant to our knowledge of him. He does not destroy but fulfils all other truth, else he would not be the Christ... Theological doctrines are valid only in so far as they point us to the fuller truth which is there in God's word in Christ.
The Christian faith is that we are created for a personal life in community where each i sustained by the others. We can have this life only if in humility we confess our dependance upon the Holy Source of Life, acknowledge God's judgment on human idols and confess our own continuing temptation to idolatry. Christianity believes in [humanity] more deeply than any other historic faith; because it believes that [a human's] spirit can be open to the cleansing and humbling which comes when God meets [that one] in self-giving love. The Christian faith gives no pat answers or panaceas. What it says is that life in all its struggle is good at the core, and that under God there is offered new life in the love which fills all struggle with meaning.
"...a proud chastity cannot really be a virtue."
Aelred Squire, Aelred of Rievaulx, A Study
" 'Greater love than this no one has, that one lay down one's life for one's friends.' (John 15:13) And how will you lay down your life for me, if you will not lend me a needle and thread when I need it? How will you shed your blood for me, if you think it beneath you to give me a cup of cold water, if you cannot be bothered to take your hand out of your pocket for me? If you refuse to say a good word of or for me, when will you die for me? Clearly from these little signs we can discern what progress we are making in obedience, and how far we are from the love of God and our neighbours, on which the whole law and prophets depend. Let us, therefore, obey each other, love each other, for love is the fulfilling of the law. This is why there is as much difference between a living person and a dead body as there is between one who loves and one who does not love."
St. Aelred of Rievaulx
Petty people are ugly people. They are people who have lost their vision. They are people who have turned their eyes away from what matters and focused, instead, on what doesn't matter. The result is that the rest of us are immobilised by their obsession with the insignificant.
It is time to rid the church of pettiness. It is time the church refused to be victimized by petty people. It is time the church stopped ignoring pettiness. It is time the church quit pretending that pettiness doesn't matter....
Pettiness has become a serious disease in the Church of Jesus Christa disease which continues to result in terminal cases of discord, disruption, and destruction. Petty people are dangerous because they appear to be only a nuisance instead of what the really area health hazard.
Mike Yaconelli, The Wittenburg Door, Dec. 1984/Jan. 1985
"Doctrine must be translated into life..."
Aelred Squire, Aelred of Rievaulx, A Study
A friend loves at all times (Proverbs 17:17a) "A friendship that an come to an end was never a true one."
St. Jerome
Donations Appreciated
On our behalf, St. Stephen's Church has kindly agreed to issue tax deductible receipts for donations of $35. These donations to St. Stephen's are in lieu of rent. Become a supporter. If you would like to do this please speak to Winston. You can reach Winston at 246-2029.
Drop us a line
Do you have a story, article or idea you wish to share? All articles must include name address and phone number. Names will not be published upon request.
Integrity /Calgary P.O. Box 23093 Connaught Postal Outlet Calgary, AB, Canada T2S 3B1(403) 270-9661
Mailing lists for Integrity/Calgary are strictly confidential. Inclusion or receipt of this newsletter or membership in Integrity/Calgary does not imply sexual orientation.
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